Norms letter to Newt
Hi Norm-
I guess I will get right to it! Dude - you asked her to move in and she did - with a kid!? Insta-family without the benefits? Yes - I went there.
I have to admit, I am confused man. I mean, I guess if you really are in love with her then dude, I hope she feels the same and isn't just using you.
Maybe I am just jaded. Most of the women chase after me because of my money. But at least I know this.
I mean if she was really in a shelter, I can see why she moved in since you introduced yourself by your employment, have the rare llama thingie and haven't made a move on her. She would have to feel safe enough with you to bring her daughter to live with you - right?
Maybe safe - like a brother safe? Sorry dude. Just putting it out there. Mother's are damn protective of their kids.
To answer your question, no - I didn't grow up in Antarctica! I spent all my free time playing football or some other sports from the time I was 5 years old up until I was 18. That was when I found out I got my algebra tutor pregnant and married her effectively putting an end to my future as a football player. I had a full ride to Bridgeport U and was going to be quarterback! Oops - I guess that's old news, but it still makes my blood boil when I think about what I missed out on.
I still like to throw the ball around with some of my buddies.
Moving on...I imagine collecting those silly Llama toys is like collecting baseball cards. Certain ones are rare and worth a shit load of money. I actually have a pretty good collection of baseball cards so seems we are both collectors.
Since Ira knew what you were talking about its no wonder she wanted to see it. Totally didn't mean to embarrass you. Hell, I was embarrassed.
So my therapist says I have to talk about my life in these letters. Boring is what it is. We haven't made any progress in the search for my wife and kids. I think I really, really need to find them.
For a few reasons. I can't move on until I do and second - well - I guess I need to apologize.
I was such a crappy husband and father and only got worse as time went on. I did some really bad things. Maybe I thought she would leave me and set me free since I couldn't leave her. I really don't know why I did what I did.
Anyway, we were never in love - in lust for sure - maybe she loved me, but I was so angry that we had to get married that if there was love, I probably destroyed it. (See - taking ownership of stuff - my therapist would be proud)
So I envy you. I am not sure I even know what it would be like to be in love. All of my relationships were based solely on satisfying physical desires.
Maybe if you are in love with Ira, you can tell me what it's like. I think I love my children. At least I know I worry about them and wonder what they are doing now. Of course that is a different kind of love - right?
Okay - enough soul searching. Let me know how it goes with Ira and your sorta, kinda, maybe-one-day daughter. Kids can be a challenge for sure so buckle up for that.
And don't thank me yet! Let's see how this 'move-in' goes first. Then I am happy to take the credit...But if it goes south, remember, I never told you to ask her to move in!
No homework this time - hell - you don't need it...Moved in... damn.
Your messed up friend.
Newt.
Norman's reply to Newt
I guess I will get right to it! Dude - you asked her to move in and she did - with a kid!? Insta-family without the benefits? Yes - I went there.
Maybe I am just jaded. Most of the women chase after me because of my money. But at least I know this.
I mean if she was really in a shelter, I can see why she moved in since you introduced yourself by your employment, have the rare llama thingie and haven't made a move on her. She would have to feel safe enough with you to bring her daughter to live with you - right?
Maybe safe - like a brother safe? Sorry dude. Just putting it out there. Mother's are damn protective of their kids.
To answer your question, no - I didn't grow up in Antarctica! I spent all my free time playing football or some other sports from the time I was 5 years old up until I was 18. That was when I found out I got my algebra tutor pregnant and married her effectively putting an end to my future as a football player. I had a full ride to Bridgeport U and was going to be quarterback! Oops - I guess that's old news, but it still makes my blood boil when I think about what I missed out on.
I still like to throw the ball around with some of my buddies.
Since Ira knew what you were talking about its no wonder she wanted to see it. Totally didn't mean to embarrass you. Hell, I was embarrassed.
So my therapist says I have to talk about my life in these letters. Boring is what it is. We haven't made any progress in the search for my wife and kids. I think I really, really need to find them.For a few reasons. I can't move on until I do and second - well - I guess I need to apologize.
I was such a crappy husband and father and only got worse as time went on. I did some really bad things. Maybe I thought she would leave me and set me free since I couldn't leave her. I really don't know why I did what I did.
So I envy you. I am not sure I even know what it would be like to be in love. All of my relationships were based solely on satisfying physical desires.
Maybe if you are in love with Ira, you can tell me what it's like. I think I love my children. At least I know I worry about them and wonder what they are doing now. Of course that is a different kind of love - right?
Okay - enough soul searching. Let me know how it goes with Ira and your sorta, kinda, maybe-one-day daughter. Kids can be a challenge for sure so buckle up for that.
And don't thank me yet! Let's see how this 'move-in' goes first. Then I am happy to take the credit...But if it goes south, remember, I never told you to ask her to move in!
No homework this time - hell - you don't need it...Moved in... damn.
Your messed up friend.
Newt.
Norman's reply to Newt
Newt is being pretty reflective here. That's hopeful.
ReplyDeleteI like his voice.
Yes. He is starting to really think about his life and take responsibility instead of blaming others.
DeleteLooks like maybe the therapy is working...?
ReplyDeleteI have always had my doubts about the ability of a former abuser to be redeemed, but I'm suppose it's not impossible.
We shall see. I need to do some research on that to see if it is possible and what it takes. I am sure it's probably a lot like an addiction maybe. An automatic response to stress or something - the need to control things they can maybe butnthrough manipulation and violence. I have no idea really - just throwing that out. So it would be something they struggle with their entire lives.
DeleteSo I did a quick search and it is similar to an addiction. And to stop those behaviors is just as difficult for them as overcoming any addiction and requires a life long commitment to understand and relearn how to interact. I think our guy here is starting to see that he is responsible for what happened but until he fully acknowledges it and stops feeling entitled and blaming others he won't get better. I think Norm has been a good influence on him and he is in therapy.
DeleteWell, he's opening up a little more and sorta feels bad. That won't fix it or him though. It's a sickness and one that's terribly hard to fix, if it ever can be. Newt has to want to get better if he's ever going to make progress. Time will tell, I suppose.
ReplyDeleteYou are right on in your assessment. We will see how if he wants to change and admit the awful truth. Norm makes him think about things differently and it confuses him. But that's a good thing!
DeleteWell, Newt is reflecting...I guess?
ReplyDeleteYes - he is - sort of.
Delete